First blog post

I've always wanted to start a blog. It's like a diary online, only the whole world can read my thoughts. I thought I'd blog when I was pregnant with Brooke, but it never happened. Then, after Brooke was born, I thought for sure I would start a blog. Nope. So now, Brooke is a year old and I'm 6 1/2 months pregnant with my second born (to be named Chloe Allison). And I'm starting a blog. And I have no idea what to write about!

My desire is not to have a blog where my whole life appears perfect (it's not.) I want to share my thoughts and be real and be an encouragement to others through my own struggles as a wife and SAH mom. I know I am extremely blessed. I'm so thankful that Matt makes enough money so that I can stay home with Brooke (and soon, Chloe). It was a lifelong dream of mine to be home with my kids, as my mom was for my brother and me. I love staying home, but it comes with its share of struggles. Loneliness, isolation, too much Seseme Street... (yes, I occasionally let my one-year-old watch Seseme Street... so sue me!) I've always been a quiet person, and now that I stay home, I think there is a temptation to totally isolate myself. I have very few "mom" friends, we've recently begun attending a new church (New Life in Conway which is overwhelmingly huge!) and I feel like my life revolves around "nap time." The last thing I want is for Brooke to miss a nap! This week, I was thinking about how fortunate I am to have time during the day to pray for the people God brings in my life, and at the same time, was asking God why He doesn't allow more people in my life so I can pray for them and minister to them. And then it dawned on me: I don't pray enough for the people God HAS brought into my life. So that has been my goal this week. I'm spending time praying for my family and my accountability girls (if any of you girls are reading this... just want you to know, I'm so thankful for you!). And as I pray for them, I want to keep up with them more... and so I isolate myself less.

"Mommy-hood" is definitely, by far, the most wonderfully frustrating job ever. This week has been good; last week was bad; next week... who knows what's in store? This week I'm weaning Brooke from nursing. It's going surprisingly smoothly. Since she was a newborn, she's been nursed to sleep. Over the last 2 months, I've weaned her from all nursings, except before nap/bedtime. And I've dreaded the transition from "nursing to sleep" to "self-soothing" (you Moms know what I'm talking about!) But she's been a trooper about falling asleep on her own. Usually about 20 min of play-fussing, then blessed quiet. I'm down to nursing only before bed... another week or so, DONE! For a couple months anyway. I spent a lot of time stressing about nursing Brooke to sleep over the past year. The experts all say, "Let your baby learn to self-soothe!" But now, looking back, the only thing I regret, is the amount of worry I dealt with. I loved the cuddle-times I got nursing her to sleep, and now I love the free time I get not nursing. So I would do it all over... without stressing. (And I'll get that chance very soon!)

Anyway, I think I hear stirring so naptime must be coming to a close. Must get dinner started!...